Here we all are, fallible, mortal humans marching through life, wandering the earth in search of our own personal truth and purpose. As intellectual beings, we are keen on finding the certainty in situations: in religion or relationships or theories. We feel a need to grasp on to tangible truths because let’s face it, life is scary and challenging at times, and having something we can dig our heels into makes stepping into the unknown every single day a little more manageable, a little more solid in a world of constantly changing surroundings.
Oftentimes we look to science to provide us that solid ground. It seems the surest route, full of facts and figures. If it can be proven, it must be so.
But even physics itself, a scholar of sciences, is built upon a state of flux. In our lives, in times of complete vulnerability, in times where we need something to lean on, we can apply the basic laws of physics. To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. So we may think that leaning on a wall grants us a certain stability we didn’t already possess, but think about this: without us pushing on it, is wall even a wall? When we rely on a structure we consider to be “solid”, we expect it to hold us up. But. A wall’s mass is pushing on us just as much as our mass is pushing on it. That is science. The wall is not holding us up when we need held up the most:
we are holding each other up.
We are working as a team. A partnership. That is unconditional love.
When we dig deeper, we realize that everything in life is relative. If beliefs are relative, then so are truths. Why? Because we believe something to be true, whether it “scientifically” is or isn’t. Truths and beliefs are one in the same. Therefore, in a way one could argue that science has no more solid answers than does, say, religion. And what universal principle are most religions based off of, once you water them all down, removing historical and political and contextual layers from them? Not science. Not fact. Not dieties or gods. LOVE. It’s an intangible force of nature, emotion, chemical reaction. And I think it’s safe to say that it’s what we are all seeking in one way or another. Not just limited to our romantic relationships, but we seek love within our friendships, our workplace, within ourselves. We even look for little moments of “love” in the form of a smile from a stranger or acknowledgement from a business partner or positive feedback from clients.
To fully benefit from the stability that a loving experience can create, we must be vulnerable enough to lean up against this theoretical wall and trust that it will be there to return the favor. Of course, the challenge is being open enough to possibly push on the wall and find that it is not stable enough for this partnership. But lean anyway. Love anyway. It’s the scariest yet most fulfilling intangible there is. Just like physics. Without teamwork, without two forces, a wall would not be a wall. You would not be upright. Without gravity the earth would float away from it’s surface. Without the earth, gravity might as well not exist.
But still, right now as we sit here, the world turns. And so we learn to accept that nothing is as it seems and exactly as it seems all at once. We realize that the wall or the family pet or the stranger next to you on the subway needs to know it exists and serves a valid purpose just as much as we do in this life.
I encourage you to find the certainty in every situation, the push and pull, the camaraderie of forces — because certainty is merely a choice. Just as is love. Everything in life, whether it be science or religion or love, is merely a matter of choosing to see it in terms of what it means to you. Choosing that beautiful balance of give and take. And if you choose to believe in solid ground, as in love and science and religion, I guarantee it will be certainly so.